One Step Man
by Arklaw
Summary: The cunning, evil-worshipping, eyebrow-lacking man named Chiba is a villain for fun. Also a self-aware Chuunibyou. After studying like a maniac for two years, he became the unstoppable plotter known as Lord Darklaw. He is now always one step ahead of everyone, always leading others by the nose, and always looking for excitement.
1. 1st Step : One Step

I am Chiba, a villain for fun.

Ever since I was young, I always admired those shadowy figures in anime. The ones with a secret identity, a secret plot nobody but them knows about, and the ability to lead the heroes into useless ventures. No matter what happens, they are always one step ahead, have anticipated every scenarios, and are never caught until the last episode where all is revealed. Their catchphrase always got me "Good, everything is going according to plan.".

During one of the normal days of my past life, I learned how I had failed at yet another college entry exam. Fed up with everything, I decided to become a villain exactly like the ones I loved, one who is always one step ahead of everyone. I spent all the economies I had left and plunged myself in studies for two whole years. I studied hard. I studied so hard my eyebrows fell off. I studied so hard that today, nothing anyone can ever do can surprise me.

With my intellect, I amassed an army of evil minions, I made a secret base no-one can find, I enlisted super-powered muscles to protect me or to sacrifice as pawns depending on my mood. My days are spent continuously harassing the authorities with kidnapping plots, bank robberies and the imminent destruction of the city. I generously let them thwart my plans of course, but nobody ever managed to stop me, the mastermind. Lord Darklaw is always one step ahead.

But what is this feeling? Now that I have achieved my dream, why does my spirit feel so empty?


	2. 2nd Step : One Script

It is a cloudy day. Another day, another evil plan. As a first-rate villain, I have a duty to uphold. Such duty brings me to witness the unfolding events I laid for my squads of evil minions. Their primary target for the past two years has been C-City, and today. In my office, I pick one of the monitors and dive into the action as an oberver and an informer. I have planned for everything today, so my intervening should not be necessary, except for the gloating part once the fighting ceases. I navigate the giant screens and monitors inside my giant office. I connect myself to Team 2, who is in the thick of it...

"Nobody moves!" Shouts the glasses-wearing henchman who is robbing the bank in my name. He is wearing the number 2 on his back, and he was the plotter of this particular robbery. His three similarilly hooded friends are also robbing the store in my name. And that name is Lord Darklaw, leader of the Dark Law Organisation. As edgy as this name might be, it remains one of the top secret society in the world despite the low amount of members it holds.

Everything moves fast from here on, my human crew knows the drill, and they manage to collect loads of bills from the cashiers. They don't approach the safes mind you. Their purpose is not to steal as much as possible, but to create a great ruckus. But once the trouble starts, a giant caped figure wearing my sigil, a Black Sword over a Bronze Sun shall move into action. A few minutes pass, and so far, the clients remained quiet.

"Squat-Master-aniki! The cops are here!" Shouts the courageous one wearing the number 1. Just as he points outside, the police cars have entered the plaza and encircled the building. In this world of Heroes and Monsters, there is still worth in public safety services. Too bad they are outmatched today. After my minions force every innocent out of the building, my caped mystery reveals himself to the cops who are approaching the bank's entrance. He isn't human, not anymore.

Squat-Master is one of the most powerful monsters I have under my thumb. Threat-Level Demon at least. Usually I send him on secret missions to get rid of competing monsters, but today's his first and last time in the spot-light. Let's talk about him a bit: according to my sources, he was once your typical C-Rank criminal. He wanted revenge against a Hero but was too poor to buy training equipement. He decided to do squats everyday even if it killed him. The results were beyond anything a lesser mind would imagine. His quadriceps quadrupled in thickness and size. His upper torso stayed roughly the same though. So now he looks like a guy wearing a fleshy exosqueleton all around his legs. Even his clothes cannot hide how disproportionnate his lower body is compared to the rest of him. A disturbing and ridiculous sight. And yet, the power of the reborn and renamed Squat-Master is not to be undermined, for his leg movements can easily breach the sound barrier. As if under a geass, this muscled Monster will, for the tenth time since I recruited him, present himself properly. Give it about two seconds... One... Two...

"I am Squat-Master-squat! I have done squats so many times I turned into a Monster-squat. Now Lord Darklaw allows me to make more money AND more squats-squat. All of you will feel the wrath of my glutes-squat!" As he finishes his mandatory introduction, Squat-Master clenches his leg muscles that expand beyond common sense. Common sense, but also beyond the black pants. I knew he would tear them up, but I still feel annoyed that he actually did, giant-sized clothes do not grow on trees. I would gladly give him elastic clothings, but he complained how itchy it felt so I had to give in. Bah... It won't matter after today. As I think about all this, his attack begins:

"One squat!" He shouts. And this single squat produces enough air pressure to send the policemen flying out of the building. This is such a ridiculous way of attacking. If that stupid monster threw a quick, the result'd be far more devstating. But, alas, nothing I suggested seemed to penetrate his muscle-filled skull. He's here for the training, the money, and the training, in that order. Whatever the case, the initial forces of Justice are in quite the pickle now.

"Haha! Dumbass!" Said a brawny underling with the number 4 on his back.

"You really thought Darklaw-sama would send us without back-up? Serves you right, copper!"

I can see from the cameras stuck on my minions' uniform how bad the damage is. One of the officer is holding his dislocated shoulder and bleeding from the shattered glasses. The recent are dioriented and groaning. No casualty so far, as expected. The innocents are only lightly wounded, they won't try to approach now. And once who I expect to come does coe, there won't be anyone else in the cross-fire.

"Tch... This is bad..." says a police girl with a tiny gun in hand. Such a weapon would be useless against Squat-Master's muscle-armor. She is obviously out of her depth and she knows it.

"I'll take it from here!" shouts a stentantor voice behind the crowd.

From the top of a building, a strong figure appeared. A man wearing a cape adorned with a giant C. HIs body shaped like a body-buiders, his face hidden under a mask. Appearing out of nowhere to save the day? He jumps from the building and lands on his knees in a heroic pose that surprisingly didn't shatter his bones. There is a shiny round plate shaped a C stuck to his left arm. It can only be: CAPTAIN C-CITY. My arch-nemesis. The Hero among Heroes. The defender of those that need defending. The greatest of the greats. The soy sauce to every meal. Et cetera et cetera... Bah, that's what he'd want you to think. And yet he is here, just as planned... Phase 1 is complete.

This new character with a lazily chosen name is actually ranked 18th among the powerful A-class heroes. While his power is no joke, the man himself is just a pathetic excuse for a professionnal Hero who never managed to fully stop my plans, ever. I even let him arrest some of my competitors, as well as some of the less manageable underlings out of pity and convenience. Because of this, Captain C-City wrongly assumes that one day, he'll be able to arrest me, the elusive Lord Darklaw, Mastermind of the evil Dark Law Organisation. Yet, every time I managed to reach my goals the public gobbled up his obvious bragging and he kept on earning credits for *almost catching me* (when I was never even close to the scenes). At any rate, the man is still very popular in his hometown, so his arrival creates a positive uproar among the citizens:

"Captain!" Says a first. "We're saved!" Assumes a second. "Help us, they're robbing the bank!" Begs a third. "They have a monster! Kill it!" Orders a fourth, swayed by the adrenaline rush and the peer pressure.

Without a word (which is rare), Captain C-City approaches the damaged building, his trusty round shild affixed to his arm. "Get the civilians to safety and get out of my way, things will get naughty in a few moments." Dispensing predictions, are we Captain? Sadly, I know you are very, very bad at them, and so does my crew: The policemen finish retreating and everyone makes room for the battle. My four underlings are just as surprised by his arrival as I am, which is absolutely not.

"Oh noooo..." Says the cheerful Henchman Number 1, rolling his eyes.

"The A-Class Hero..." Continues the serious Henchman Number 2, sighing.

"The greeeeat Captain C-City has arrived..." Adds the skippy Henchman Number 3, rubbing her arms in false fear.

"Whatever shall we do..?" Finishes the brooding Henchman Number 4, shrugging.

"You maggots will fall at the feet of Justice. that's what!" Confidently announces the warrior of peace. You have to admire how clueless he can be when it comes to social skills, he always took my men seriously. As I probably mentionned, we used his zeal to get rid of opposing threats. By mistaking local yakuzas and monsters for members of my organisation, This Hero. But our history will end today. And in two seconds, he will make the gravest error of his carrier and launch his powerful shield at Squat-Master. One... Two...

"C-City Buster!" He announces, as he always does. His special technique consists of throwing his C-shaped shield like a disqus. It cleaves through foes like butter and can bounce. is not to be underestimated, I saw it cleave the head off of a threat level Tiger in one hit. His C-City Buster never misses its mark, when I'm not involved that is. Squat-Master trained for this day relentlessly, and now is his time to shine. The musce monster jumps into action with a battle-cry:

"Squat-Squat-Squat!"

The impact is great, the wind howls in the plaza and even my underlings are pushed back by the shockwave. But in the end, as expected, Squat-Master managed to catch the plated shield between his quadriceps. Seeing this impossible feat come true, the A-Class Hero gulps:

"My C-City Buster? H-how on earth... Whoa!" Not wasting time for once, the Demon-level Calamity got extremely close to the Hero and placed himself in squatting stance.

"Two Squats!" He announce.

And two very fast squats create gusts of wind so strong that the feeble HeroGet thrown all the way onto the seventh flootr of a distant nearby building. I see his back bouncing against the concrete when he falls down, but I know he is tough enough to survive such a hit. I expressedly ordered Squat-Master not to go too hard on him in exchange for some free proteins back at base.

"Nice shot Bakaptain!" Taunts Henchman Number 3 while the other criminals keep the loot safe.

The downside of C-City Buster is that, should the shield be caught, the Captain can only use it once. After that, C-City Captain is the only threat. While stronger than the average B-Class Hero, he is far inferior to a Demon-Level. Now weapon-less, he tries his best against Squat-Master but gets toyed with like a ragdoll. He gets up, S squats, and the Cap goes flying. Rinse and repeat. Meanwhile, my minions will used the distraction to get away in the van I had prepared for them.

If any Hero Association officials were looking (which I know is the case), the threat must have switched to Demon. More A-Class Heroes will be dispatched and perhaps an S-Class, if one decided to miss the meeting taking place in A-City today. I planned for that though, and the getaway car will arrive in Two seconds. One... Two... There it is, a black van with Dark Law on the side of the vehicule just turned at the corner of the plaza. Very conspicuous, but it gets points for style. The screeching tires and the horn sounds push back the remaining passerbies. After a perfect drift that I made sure she mastered before-hand, Henchman Number 5 opens the doors for her colleagues..

"Get in boys and girls!" She shouts like a proper Hero. More proper than this pityful A-Class surely.

As they enter the vehicule, one of my henchman stops to savour this victory a little more.

"A-class my ass! You ain't worth squat! Hah!" Insults the surly Henchman Number 3. Squat-Master's small torso swells with pride and his leg muscles tremble with delight. That HN3 girl is just as bad of a sadist as you'd expect for my criminal crew. She is one of the ore amusing members of Dark Law. Her insults remain predictable, but I appreciate the attempts and the random acts of violence. I will witness one shortly too I think.

We are reaching the end of today's endeavor, and it is time to put the final nail on the Hero's verbal coffin. The back-window of the car houses a giant screen, and it is directed towards the wounded Hero. It activates. On it is yours truly, Lord Darklaw. My face is masked like an opera's cantor. I am wearing a businessan's suit paid in full. There is a rose in my breast pocket and I have a sleeping cat on my lap. Truly, I look like the Apex of villainy. I take as much satisfaction as I can from this performance, for it is my favorite part; The part where I can say my piece like the Mastermind I always dreamed to be:

"Once again, Captain, I was one step ahead." Says I, the perfect criminal who plans everything in the tiniest details. I offer one last piece of advice. "Go home and keep out of my way if you know what's good for you."

Unable to continue fighting, Captain C-City falls to his knees and begins crying. He clenches his fists, hits the grounds and coughs up the remains of his defiance: "Curse you Darklaw! This is not over! I will get you next time."

"Fuhahahaha!" I gloat. "There will be no next time for you, Captain. Today was the last time the two of us would speak. Today is the last day of Captain C-City, broken by his own weakness. BUt for now, the Dark Law shall gladly leaves with its well-earned profits. Farewell!"

I cut the connection. Everything went as I imagined. Perhaps a bit too much, but I am satisifed. And with that, the van departs. The five escaping criminals cheer all the way down the street. Since I had had the police headquarters sabotaged, the police were unable to prepare barrages today. Thus, literally nothing stands in the way of my men. As for Squat-Master, he runs away by himself. Thanks to his powers, all he needs to do is squatting and jumping like a malformed bunny, and he will reach the shore before any new Hero may reach the scene.

As the leader, it is natural for me to congratulate the groups. I address my minions using the screen inside the getaway car:

"Well done... Begin retreat to base Team 2. Your diversion was effective and Team 1 secured our secondary objective as soon as Captain C-City left his appartment."

I check the other monitor once again.

"Thanks Lord Darklaw! Another day being evil is another day getting loaded haha!" Chirps Henchman Number One. The rest of the team clamors as well, except for Number Four.

"Boss." He calls me. "Why do we bother with all the non-killing business? I'm alright with stuff being more dangerous, we don't need some Monster farts to make people fear us, right?"

Technically, Squat-Master doesn't fart. But HN4 makes a fair point. It isn't the first time he Not killing is bothersome and wastes y resources when I could let my underlings go wild. I still believe once the bodies start dropping, the S-Class hero will start appearing. Should Tornado of Terror or any group of S-Class attack my base, my full army of followers wouldn't last a day. That is a fact. But even then, I have counter-measures for days, even against an all-out assault by the full S-Class Roster. The Base can be evacuated quickly and we could relocate as much as we want thanks to my planning skills. So as the brooding man says, I could stop holding them back. However, I do not appreciate my methods being questionned, ever. My brow begins to itch, but I resist the urge. I inspire slowly, then employ a berating tone. I hope this will change his reaction, but I know it probably won't.

"HN4, you have been around the longest. You know I have never been wrong. NEVER. My plans are perfect, my decisions are perfect. I know what you think and how you will respond. You know this, I know you know I know this. There is no room for error in my judgements and neither should there be in yours. So just listen to my plans and stop wasting my time with your pointless bloodlust. Is that clear?"

"But Boss, I..."

"SILENCE!" I yell as soon as the first words coincide with y expectations. The van turns completely silent. "Just take a look at the Script if you don't believe me. But this will be the last time."

Already I have forgotten all about my satisfying speech to Captain C-City. What a bother. To make my point clear, I transfer one of my classified documents on the screen for all to see. It contains the Script for today. My so-called Scripts are the works only I can make. Complete details for the day wherever my Dark Law is to be involved. It includes the words I know are going to be spoken, the decisions made, the events occuring, and what to do if something goes a certain way. Of course, the Scripts aren't perfect, and anything I expected and deduced can changei if I make too much changes or if I need information I have no access too. I usually make multiple Scripts for the same day with branching narratives that will depend on my mood/ Normally my squads have very short parts of a Script, but today, I'm feeling vindictive and generous. They slowly read through everything; the policemen being slightly injured, Squat-Master's speech, Number Five's arrival with a perfect drift, HN3's insult, all this leading to one last piece of dialogue at the very end:

_HN4 : Boss. Why do we bother with all the non-killing business? I'm alright with stuff being more dangerous, we don't need some Monster farts to make people fear us, right?_

_Unless I remain silent, whatever I say to convince HN4 will most likely trigger the following response:_

_HN4: But Boss, I just want to make sure you're not going soft on us._

As always, they look baffled by how precise the information is; As if I came back from the future to write everything that went down. it certainly had an effet, I can read it on their faces. They turn to their disgruntled comrade, who is currently rolling his thumbs in embarassment. I use the moment to press on the attack:

"Only I can change the Script, and I can make sure you take on a good role, or a bad role. Is that clear HN4?" I threaten. Still, for a moment, I selfishly hope HN4 will say something novel, something I do not expect. I observe his features, looking for a sign of subterfuge, of hidden malice, of betrayal. But the moment passes and, HN4 relents like a beaten dog.

"Yes Boss. All clear. You're never wrong and we get the goods. You'll get no problem from me."

Disapointing, but the matter is solved. I momentarily wonder if I should open the folder containing the discussion they're about to engage in, just to make sure, but HN4 beats me to the beat.

"Why do you have to make the boss mad?" Scolds Number Three with a deep frown and a soft slap on Number Four's shoulder. "Lord Darklaw can guess what you're gonna say ten days before you even think about it. Of course he knows what he's doing!"

"We have an easy job, let's just enjoy it." Proposes HN2 while putting his glasses back in place.

This is how they start discussing, and I already know what will be said. Obviously I wrote what would be said. So I cut the communication and I lean back on my chair. They should arrive at head-quarters in about six minutes, though Squat-Master should arrive much earlier. I get up from my chair and look outside my office. The sky is still grey, just like my thoughts. I pull the rose in my pocket and go to place it in the vase at the end of the room. I hope I can use it again soon, that speech was the highlight of my week. There are few things I can never really predict, and myself is one of them. I don't know how long I can keep a straight face for, I am not unfeeling and perfect, I get angry sometimes. But sometimes, it doesn't matter. I long for the day where i make a huge mistake and something interesting happens. Of course, I'd never purposefuly foil my evil plans. That's not what a Mastermind, what Lord Darklaw does.

Once again, everything went according to plan. No S-Class would be dispatched for a mere Bank robbery. And even then, by the time they be dispatched when the Monsters shows his stuff, my crew'd be long gone. I can predict decisions as easily as I can predict lines spoken in a movie I saw a thousand times. I studied so much I can expect anything. THis is overpowered as far as abilities go, but very, very boring. I chose the mantle of a villain for it was my ambition to manipulate the world from the shadows. A Masterind that plans ahead, forcing Heroes to react and not act. But sadly, I was too successful. My contacts are unnummerable, my wealth keeps growing, I have subtly amassed powerful forces that may one day threaten even the Hero Association. The only Hero with the faintest chance of ever stopping me was that bothersome Craptain C-City. Hrm... Craptain... I've been letting my minions influence me lately...

To reiterate, Team 2 made a mess with the bank robbery. That was Phase 1 to attract Captain C-City away from his home. Then, Team 1 would enter his apartment and steal the secret files he has stored in his computer. Once his wife finds out the content, she will never let him leave the house again. It might seem unlikely, but that's how things wil play out, every scenario I made proved it. The only way A-Class Hero number 18 coes back from this is if I told his wife I fabricated the files (which I didn't). To be honest, I could have gotten rid of him anytime and any number of ways. But stealing his hidden porn folders and showing them to his wife so she forces him to stop being a hero forever? Now that's one of the better options. The outcome is known to me, so I don't need to watch like the rest of Team 1 and 2 once they arrive home. Whatever excuse that Hero would give probably wouldn't surprise me either. Just thinking about it makes me yawn. A big yawn, and probably not the last one for today. It is then that another sensation closes in on me.

"Oh great, now I want to yawn AND I feel itchy." I say out loud. Ever since I lost my eyebrows, that area has started to itch whenever something especially boring is about to happen. I check my clock, then I count down. Two... One... Behind me, the steel door to my office explode. The two wings slide on the ground until my metal desk stops them clean. An enormous figure enters my office. It is Squat-Master. Alone. Arrogant. Uninvited. Unappologetic. Right on schedule.

"Hey boss. Thanks for the proteins." He cheers, a giant recycled plastic cup in hand. (we take the environment seriously in the evil business. Can't feed people to sharks if the oceans are poisonned).

"I made a promise, and I keep my promises." I assure him. "But did you have to break the door? It was open..."

"Oh yes-squat, sorry about that-squat. but speaking of promises-squat... I've been thinking-squat." Explains the literal muscle-head as he crushes his container and drops it on the carpet floor. God, can that giant idot find better lines than these? And what part of littering can remotely sound macho? The urge to yawn again overwhelms me. But since I don't want him to feel bad in the middle of his speech, I hide my mouth with my two hands, feigning discomfort.

"I'm... I'm listening?" I neutrally stutter. I know I am a very bad actor. I also know it won't really matter today. Slowly, my monster henchman makes his way towards me, each of his steps shaking the room.

"At first I wanted revenge against the S-class hero-squat, Superalloy Darkshine-squat." He reveals as if this was a theatre play. "That's why I joined Dark Law-squat. Thanks to you and your facility I could train myself and surpass my limit-squats. But now that I think about it-squat, my squating powers have made me more powerful than anyone in the world-squat. So my vengeance can wait-squat, no-squat?"

He opens his blood-shot eyes wide open and curves his short back the wrong way, making him look even less human than before.

"Howsabout I take all of the money as well as your life-squat?" He approaches by desk, cross his arms and prepares for one of his squat-attacks. His eyes are devoid of compassion as he grins like a maniac. "For what it's worth-squat, it was fun-squat."

Normally, when someone says.

"Yes, I knew a monster like you wouldn't be controlled for long." I sigh. And the foolish monsters doesn't squat yet.

"Squahahah! Then you should have done something about it-squat." He lectures me. I repeat, he LECTURES me. The mastermind. That buffon. I knew every word he would say TO THE LETTER. I knew where he would be TO THE MILLIMETER. Rage engulfs my mind. How can someone so powerful be so BORING at the same time. I feel the blood rushing through my neck, the itch on my missing eyebrows makes me scratch it to the point of blood. I almost lose characters as I spit out:

"Funny you should say that you worthless fool..." Just as I press a button on my wrist, the belt on my idiot underling activates. 6 000 000 volts of electricity erupt from it and pierce his trained flesh. The bolts dance on him like cheerful puppies in the tall grass. As a result of their bouncing and digging, Squat-Master's skin becomes black as charcoal in places. Dazed, he abandons his squating position and falls to the ground, lifeless. No matter how tough, his body still had nerves, and nerves can be short-circuited. I watch his body in silence expecting the unexpected. Will the monster wake up? Did I miscalculate anything? Will someone enter the room to ambush me? Did I forget any step?

When after a full two minutes the unexpected doesn't come, I activate another switch. One for the floor to open, making him fall into a vat of acid. One should never forget the classics. One last push on my gauntlet activate the room's venting system. Cooked monster meat is not a decent perfume for a Mastermind's office. I take a seat. My anger still remains, and my boredom is is a bottle of wine in the fridge under my desk. I slowly reach for it and an empty glass, then I start pouting. Despite this exciting situation where I was one step away from death, I felt nothing. Everything went exactly as I imagined, from the glass of wine in my hand down to the smallest twitch of Squat-Master's quadriceps. And once again, I have to yawn. The yawning, in turn, angers me once again. I pour myself another shot in order to drown it all: the ennui, the frustration, the lack of challenge life gives me. I'd give everything for a decent problem to solve. And no, growing back my eyebrows does not count. Whatever...

I turn on the tv screen to my left to see if the news have something good to say. Hmm... Alien visitors have destroyed A-City in a single strike. Guess the Prophet Shibabawa wasn't wrong after all. I knew that, of course. I was a step ahead and had placed her residence under surveillance, so I knew all about this _Earth in trouble _business. I even had Dr Bofoy share a bit of data from his satellites, so I had a rough estimate of the threat. A very high-rated Dragon in this case. But far from God, as always.

My superior mind tells me A-City still has a chance at revenge. After engaging the S-class heroes head on, there's bound to be some casualties on both sides. Blast is sure to return and save the day as my intel suggest he always has. THis I look forward to. The battle will probably last days though, so I have time to plan ahead. There's is no way these invader could be in good shape after the brawl starts. They'll most likely retreat north, past the ocean, and into P-City. That's one of the many possibilities I plan for anyway. Then, once the weakened aliens try and take a breath, my goons'll ambush them and take the credit. I have more Demon-Level Monsters and A-Class criminals in these areas. This is a great opportunity. Should my Dark Law become the savior of a city, it might just create some interesting scenarios for once. I know just the steps to take already. But first things first. In two seconds, Henchman Number 1 will barge in screaming like he usually does... One... two...

"Hey hey hey Boss!" He screams as he slams the door open. He removed his hood so I can see his short red hair and the three cute scars on his forehead (which he got from his cat). I can hear the rest of the squad shouting down the corridor but HN1 makes the most noise. "The money is secured and prepped for cleaning! Howsabout you join us and celebrate?" Says my young acolyte without a care for his surroundings. And then, my so-called HN1 takes a closer look at me.

"Whoa you're bleeding! Everything alright?"

"What happened to Squat-Master-aniki? I thought he'd be here? Said he wanted to speak with you." He asks. There are so many ways I could respond... I could say: _He is done squatting around here. _ Or : _I killed him. _Or:_ I gave him a new mission. _But I have no incentive for either a pun or the truth or a lie, so I just stay silent and stare at the burns part of the carpet. HN4 scratches his head, puzzled. Just as I expected, he finally goes back to his initial query.

"I should probably go then." He finally realizes "... Or are you coming with?" Nevermind...

"I have better things to do." I explain with a shake of the head and a sigh. "If you want to see something good, call everyone to video-room B. You'll see the finale of Captain C-City"s journey as a Hero of Justice." Captain C-City should reach his home in about 7 inutes, after stopping to give his Hero clothes to the tailor for repairs. When his wife welcomes him with the recordings I had placed in her mailbox, he'll have some explaining to do. The cameras will record everything and probably cheer my henchmen substantially. The red-headed Henchan 4 isn't looking to happy for now however.

"Er... Yeah, OK." He says, a bit saddened from my refusal to partake. HN1 isn't scared easily, but he still has a lot to learn in the ways of evil henchmen. Bah... What is it with these people trying to socialize? We are an evil organisation, not an evil karaoke club. Do your job and be creative for once instead of playing and wasting my time with redundant drivels. I need more wine. I take another sip but then I see the boy still standing there. I knew he wouldn't know when to leave, but I just didn't want to bother. I give a simple order before the silence turns even more awkward:

"You are dismissed."

"Ah? Er... Sure. Lord Darklaw sir..." I know this little episode won't interfere with his abilities, so it doesn't matter how I reacted anyway. Once he closes the door and reaches the others in the back of the corridors, I open the camera screen. I see the all, smiling, even Number One manages to put troubles behind him for the sake of simple fun. I envy their ability to enjoy life despite how expectable and trivial it can be, for I can no longer enjoy what I already expect. I sometimes wish I didn't spend all those years studying to become a villain. For despite as I became the Masterind of my dreams, I also became the Master of Boredom.

My poor yet lucky minions. They still believe I have something big planned. That would explain why we gathered enough money to buy a whole city. But the truth is... I have nothing in store for them. Their luxurous pay satisfies them for the moment, but I have no illusion that they will ask for more, sooner or later. Probably Four months from now at least. But thankfully, I have plans in store for the future as well. Speaking of planning, I need to confer with the one person that truly understands me. I press another button on my desk and wait for her as I follow the news. I should just end this evil play already.

The spaceship that destroyed A-City is currently riddled wth little explosion. Guess the S-class heroes are on the case now. From what I can see, it should take them about two days of desperate struggle before they get rid of these invaders. Not surprising with the Tornado of Terror on their side. They will have casualties though...

At last my secretary arrives while I have my back turned towards the sea. She is called Shhorue, a former salarywoman who gave up on her job after overworking made her depressed and suicidal. Nasty business I helped her take revenge for. I knew her from before my training as a Mastermind, and she knows how I became what I am. Noone knows what I can do better than her, though she still cannot figure exactly HOW I do what I do. Neither do I really... She is as beautiful as ever. Her brown ponytail is caught inside her grey business suit. She has a serious face but her blue eyes are full of kindness.

"Lord Darklaw, has everything gone to plan?" She asks as she always does. But everytime, she tries to say the line slghtly differently. Angrily, worryingly, lovingly... This smaller detail is something I have far more trouble predicting compared to the outcome of a Hero-Monster fight. Today, it was sensually. Not my first guess. This successful attempt at thwarting my predictions brings a smile to my face.

"It has, sadly... A minor plot; Captain C-City is out of the picture, we secured more funds, and Squat-Master's ambitions are quelled. Oh, and please, it's just Chiba to you." I implore her.

"As you wish Chiba-sama." She teases amicably. I take a long look at her and I adopt as pleased a face as I can. Her smile is one of the few things I haven't grown tired of predicting yet. I dread the day where even it becomes an annoyance. So if faking emotions around her can help improve her mood, then so be it.

Now that she joned Dark Law, Shikayama's job is to handle the data side of the organisation. It's a slow and relaxing work where she just need to fill blanks on a screen. She approaches my desk with a pile a paper under her shoulder. Reports from the many businesses my organisation controls. She doesn't give me a status report, for she knows I already know what happened in every one of them. We've been at it for a long time now, and she has learned to live with it. Mostly she collects and stores my Scripts. Then she cuts the useful data and pass it along the chain of command. It took a long while to perfect the system. Omniscience is only useful when you have proper management of the data in store after all.

"You're bleeding." She says worryingly.

Like with Number One, Iknew she would say that. I know. I knew. I will know. How boring it would be to read my thoughts when they all consist of is *_I know*_s. Shorue takes a piece of cloth, pours and pass on it my brow. As one might guess, today is not the first time I scratched my skin off out of frustration.

"I still know everything about everyone. What's gonna happen next, what I should do. It's like I can see all futures and they become so incredibly dull for it."

She places the bloodied cloth in the dirty laundry, then gets closer to my chair.

"I know you're about to touch my shoulder to comfort me." I warn her as I touch the wound on my forehead machinally.

For a moment she hesitates, but with a bright smile I cannot see but expect her to wear, she gently rubs my shoulder. Her hand is cold but the sensation feels nice. I close my eyes, inhale and exhale. Then I shake my head and pump myself up. I look at her and she shrugs.

"Just because you know it's happening doesn't mean it should bother you." Is what her voice says. I shrug as well.

"I knew you were gonna say that, but thank you Shorue, really."

"Speaking of bother, some of the personel are not happy with your disdainous attitude. HN4 looked glum when he went to Video-Room 2. Maybe you should stop being so much in character around our core members?"

This again... In the long term, HN4's behaviour won't matter that much. What's the point of worrying about something every scenario say won't amount to much in the future? HN4, or rather Toyada, will never betray Dark Law so long as my predictions remain exact. I wish the opposite was possible, but so far, I have been very disappointed.

"I know, but I don't see the use in changing. It's not like it'll matter later." I say while a yawn starts to rise in my throat.

"Perhaps, but you coul still..."

"I know, Shorue. Let's move on please." I insist, hiding my mouth.

"Understood Chiba-sama."

This is our normal, the norm. Dark Law is a perfect performance advancing through our Scripts. Nothing ever takes us by surprise, we are always a step ahead. Now let's get to work. I put the wine back in the fridge. Hopefully the alcohol will numb my senses enough and everything wil sound surprising and unexpected. I doubt it, but it doesn't stop me.

"So. What's the news of the..."

Suddenly, the entire room begins shaking and I stop in my tracks. This... This is new... Earthquakes and lottery tickets are things I can't predict. A nice treat for today. I press my gauntlet to look for the seismograph and see where it came from. I read, and...

"Huh?" I exclaim. Then I look again. "What the hell?" I mutter.

Nothing from the detectors. Was shaking created by the wind? I chose this creek for our headquarters specifically because there were no strong winds here. But what... It can't be... Squat-Master? No no no... I threw his body in the acid. So how could he possibly do this? No, it's not him... Did I drink more than I thought?

"Chiba? What are you doing?" Inquires Shorue, whom I have no time to respond to.

Then what? It came from the west. From the ocean? Another Sea Monster came up and shook the air? No no... their King died a few days ago and only he had the strength to do that. Dear god where is it coming from then the Sky King? Ah why am I even wondering? the detectors would have picked up any intruder Wait, the west... It can't be the spaceship? My intel suggested it had canons, but shockwaves that'd cross an ocean? Wait a second... Did I say wondering? Am I... Actually wondering what this is?

"C-Chiba? look?" Shorue nervously calls as cold sweat slides down her cheeks. "Outside."

"Outside? What is there to see?" I ask, more confused than I ever were in the last three years.

"The sky." She points up.

I finaly raise y head and see what lies beyond my office window. I am speechless. Dear god... It was a cloudy day just a minute ago, the meteo even expected light rain during the evening. And now, whoa... The heavens are clearer than a summer day. Like a thousand volcanoes erupted and pushed the clouds away. The strength required to do something like that... It's... I don't...

"What could do something like this?" She demands. "Chiba? What happened?"

And for the first time in three long years, I give the brightest smile of my life as I say that one sentence, that common expression, those four words I never thought I'd utter again:

"I have no idea!"


End file.
